I have learned that...
Some women do not want to parent.
Sometimes it's not a matter of money, health, opportunity, support, abuse, religion, coercion, safety, addiction, education, employment, or peer & family pressure.
Some women choose adoption in order to pursue their goals unfettered.
Some women find it a relief to make an adoption plan for their child.
Some women who are personally and situationally capable of parenting are flatly not interested in doing so.
Reality is independent of what I want to believe.
If you hurt, you hurt, If I hurt, I hurt. Neither of us has to justify our pain to the other.
There are choices I will never understand.
I believe that...
These women have as much right to make an adoption plan as a woman has to NOT make an adoption plan.
A woman (with or without means) is no more "wrong" for choosing adoption than a woman (with or without means) is "wrong" for choosing to raise her child.
These women are no more deserving than any other woman of being called "cold, callous, heartless, disturbed, sick, twisted, dysfunctional, ignorant, easily-led, weak, cruel, unnatural, or pathetic."
None of us can inhabit the heart, mind or shoes of another.
Von, who takes a lot of fire for speaking freely, is right. Collectively, we need to show more empathy, so that every voice may be heard.
Click here to purchase Sally's adoption book, What I Want My Adopted Child to Know: An Adoptive Parent's Perspective, in softcover, hardcover, or e-book formats.
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